Saturday, October 15, 2011

Breast Cancer Awareness

A few weeks ago I went to my OB for a lump I had found and he immediately sent me in to get a diagnostic mammogram and an ultrasound.  A diagnostic mammogram is a more intense mammogram, nothing different than a mammogram however - still get scrunched and flattened.  Ouch.  When I walked back there, I started tearing up as I see all of these women in their pink shirts waiting to be tested as well.  I was a bit nervous I guess you could say.  Erik wasn't allowed back there so I had to do it alone.

Both the mammogram and ultrasound came back abnormal and the radiologist and my OB suggested I see a surgeon to take it out.  I wasn't thrilled with having another surgery but went anyway.  On Monday I went to the surgeon, she looked at the films and examined me and said that yes, it needs to come out.  They just weren't sure what it was, and of course everyone's fear is that it is cancer.  So on Tuesday I had surgery.  Lots of emotions going through my head.  Of course you always think the worst - it's cancer, I'm going to have to shave my head, have chemo, get really sick, etc.  It was such an emotional time even going to pick up my pain meds for surgery on Monday evening.  I went to the Safeway pharmacy (we have to get our prescriptions filled there) and the entire store was filled with breast cancer awareness stuff.  Pink ribbons everywhere.  I couldn't control the tears, they just streamed down my face as I walked back towards the pharmacist.  I was trying so hard not to tear up as they were filling my prescriptions by walking around the store, but every isle had pink ribbons.  What a tribute to Safeway for giving such attention to this deadly disease. 

I'm now all bruised, swollen and sore.  The surgeon was able to remove the entire lump and told Erik it was "cyst like" but she would get the results back on Friday whether or not it was cancer.  Erik and Guy had given me a blessing Monday night and I felt soooo warm inside, I knew everything was going to be okay.  I honestly wasn't worried at all after that.  Yesterday afternoon around 3:00 I got a phone call from the surgeon's office telling me that I  had some technical term that I didn't understand.  She then said, "you had a ruptured cyst and it's benign."  Oh what sweet words those were to hear!  No sweeter words could have ever been spoken to me at that time.  My heart skipped a minute when she told me the technical words, but then that sweet calm and peace I felt when she said it was a ruptured cyst and NOT cancer.  The surgeon was amazing, so tender and had great bedside manner! 

I'm so grateful for Erik, for his wonderful blessing of peace and comfort and also for the amazing technology we have now.  I'm also so grateful for the amazing support I received from friends and family.  Dinner was brought in by Debbie & Karen on Tuesday and Wednesday.  (It was so delicious too!!!)  I am soooooooo blessed and such a lucky, lucky woman to know so many amazing women!!  I love my life.